Monday, 16 December 2024

How to Deal With Grief: My Journey of Losing My Mum

How to Deal With Grief: My Journey of Losing My Mum



If someone were to ask me how to deal with grief, I’d say this: time heals, but there isn’t a “right” way to react, respond, or cope. Grief is a long journey, and sometimes, it feels never-ending.


I lost my mum in 2006 when she was only 40 years old. I was just 12 then, and my entire world had shattered. Even now, at 32, I feel like a part of me died with her. The best way to describe this feeling is captured in the quote: “Now I have to remember you for longer than I have known you,” by C.C. Aurel.


When you lose a parent so young, you’re forced to grow up quickly. At the time, I didn’t fully grasp how much it would impact me or my siblings. But as I’ve grown older, I’ve truly understood what I lost that night: her unconditional love, guidance, and everything she was to me. There’s no love like a mother’s love, and living the years without her has been a whirlwind journey filled with ups and downs.


Some days, I can accept her absence. Other days, I forget she’s not here, and the sadness washes over me as if I’m reliving her death all over again. That void—the emptiness of knowing we can no longer speak to or hold the people we’ve lost—is indescribable.


Coping With Grief


People often give advice about how to handle grief, but the truth is, there’s no one-size-fits-all solution. For me, it’s about taking things one day at a time and allowing myself to feel whatever emotions arise. I’ve found comfort in what I call my “gentle days.” On those days, I let myself cry, talk to her out loud, or sit in complete silence. It might sound unusual, but it’s something my therapist encouraged me to do, and it helps me feel closer to her.


Praying has also been a source of strength. In those quiet moments, I feel like I can open my heart to God without any limits. I’ve also found joy in doing things my mum loved, like baking, taking care of my home, or going window shopping. Recreating those moments makes me feel as though she’s still with me.


Grief doesn’t follow a set timeline. It’s okay to feel sadness, anger, guilt, or even relief—and sometimes, all of those emotions at once. They’re normal and valid.


Honouring Your Mother’s Memory


Keeping your loved one’s memory alive is one way to cope. For me, it’s writing letters to her, looking at old photos, or carrying on traditions we shared. Cherish the good moments and lessons learned—it truly helps with the grieving process.


But don’t forget to find joy, too. Grief doesn’t erase happiness. I believe my mum would want me to be happy and to live my life fully. Mothers, whether living or past, want their children to thrive. Finding joy is one of the greatest ways we can honour their love and keep them with us.


Seeking Support


You don’t have to go through this alone. Talking to friends, family, or even a therapist can make a world of difference. For me, therapy has been incredibly rewarding. When I was younger, I struggled to express my emotions and found comfort in spending time with friends as a distraction. But as I grew older, I realised that lingering pain needed to be addressed.


Finding the right therapist through BetterHelp helped me process my grief in ways I never thought possible. It gave me tools to cope and a safe space to share my insecurities, highs, and lows without judgment. I highly recommend seeking professional support—it can empower you to find purpose through your pain.


Taking Care of Yourself


In the early days of grief, it’s easy to neglect your physical and mental health. Be gentle with yourself. Rest, eat, and move your body when you can. Journaling, meditating, and simply allowing yourself to be are all valid ways to heal.





It’s also important to acknowledge those moments when your grief feels especially heavy—like anniversaries, holidays, and birthdays. On my mum’s birthday and the anniversary of her passing, I take the day off and do things she would have loved, like browsing home décor at Harrods or watching her favourite shows with tea and biscuits. One year, I released a balloon in her honour at Prussia Cove in Cornwall. Being surrounded by nature made me feel so close to her.


Finding Purpose Through Pain


To anyone reading this who has lost their mother, I hope you eventually find peace. I pray that you’re able to turn your pain into purpose and find the joy your mother would have wanted for you. For me, that purpose has come through creativity, the wisdom my mum instilled in me, and cherish the memories we shared.


Although grief is a lifelong journey, it’s also a reminder to treasure the moments we have and the people we love.


“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” – Psalm 73:26


If you’re grieving, know that you’re not alone. Share this with someone who may need it.



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Sunday, 8 December 2024

How to Make a Classic Santa Spritz Cocktail Without Prosecco


The holiday season is here, and what better way to celebrate than with a festive cocktail? If you love the idea of a Santa Spritz but don’t have Prosecco on hand—or prefer a smoother, non-sparkling drink—this simplified version is perfect for you. It’s vibrant, easy to make, and packed with holiday charm. Let’s get started!


Why Skip the Prosecco?


While Prosecco is a classic ingredient in most spritz cocktails, this version is tailored for those who:

Want a less fizzy drink.

Don’t have sparkling wine but still want a festive cocktail.

Prefer a simpler, budget-friendly option that’s equally delicious.


With just a few basic ingredients, you can whip up a Santa Spritz big on flavour and holiday cheer.


Santa Spritz Recipe Without Prosecco



Ingredients:

250ml (about 1 cup) chilled cranberry juice (for a festive red colour and tart flavour)

250ml (about 1 cup) chilled pomegranate juice (adds depth and richness)

125ml (about 1/2 cup) vodka (adjust to taste)

118ml soda water (for a subtle fizz)

Ice cubes (to keep it refreshing)


Garnish Options:

Fresh cranberries (for a festive pop of colour)

A sprig of rosemary (for holiday flair and aroma)


Instructions:

1. Prepare the Cocktail Mix:

Combine the chilled cranberry juice, pomegranate juice, and vodka in a cocktail shaker. Shake well to blend the flavours and chill the mixture.

2. Assemble the Drink:

Fill a stemless wine glass or tumbler with ice and a handful of fresh cranberries. Add soda water for a light, refreshing touch.

3. Add the Cocktail Mix:

Pour the shaken mixture over the soda water and ice. Stir gently to combine without losing the fizz.

4. Garnish for the Holidays:

Add a rosemary sprig to the side of the glass for a festive aroma and visual appeal. For an extra touch, rim the glass with sugar before assembling the drink.

5. Serve and Enjoy:

Your Santa Spritz is ready! Sip, savour, and let the holiday spirit flow.


Presentation and Serving Tips

Use clear glasses to showcase the beautiful red hue of the cocktail and the garnish.

For an added festive touch, garnish the rim with sugar or crushed candy canes.

Serve alongside holiday appetisers like charcuterie boards, spiced nuts, or mini Christmas cookies.


Why This Recipe Is Perfect for the Holidays


This Santa Spritz without Prosecco is:

Simple and Quick: Ready in minutes with ingredients you likely already have.

Visually Stunning: Its deep red tones and festive garnishes make it a showstopper at any gathering.

Customizable: Whether you make it non-alcoholic or add a spicy twist, it fits everyone’s preferences.


Final Thoughts


I hope you’ll give this Santa Spritz a try! It’s the perfect drink for cosy nights by the fire or lively holiday parties. If you make this cocktail, share your creations with me—I’d love to see how you bring your own festive flair to it.


Here’s to a season filled with love, laughter, and delicious sips. Cheers, and Happy Holidays!


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Sunday, 17 November 2024

Holiday Gift Ideas for Her: Thoughtful Presents to Brighten Her Season



The holidays are the perfect time to show the women in your life just how much you appreciate them. Whether you’re shopping for your mom, partner, sister, or friend, finding the perfect gift that reflects her personality and interests is a great way to make the season feel even more special. From cosy essentials to luxurious indulgences, here are some fantastic holiday gift ideas for her.


1. For the Beauty Lover


If she’s all about skincare, makeup, or self-care, she’ll love receiving beauty products that help her relax and feel pampered. Some great options include:

Luxury Skincare Set: Treat her to a high-end skincare set that will make her feel like she’s at a spa. Brands like Drunk Elephant, La Mer, and Tatcha offer sets that combine luxury with effective results.

Beauty Advent Calendar: A fun and festive way to gift her a variety of beauty products, from skincare to makeup. Many brands, like Sephora and L’Occitane, offer beauty advent calendars that are packed with miniatures of her favourite products.

LED Face Mask: For the woman who loves skincare technology, an LED therapy mask (like Dr Dennis Gross or Foreo UFO 2) can elevate her skincare routine by promoting healthier skin with light therapy.


2. For the Fashionista


If she’s a trendsetter or just loves to update her wardrobe, you can never go wrong with stylish fashion finds. Here are a few ideas that will help her step up her style game:

Cashmere Sweater: A soft and luxurious cashmere sweater is a timeless gift that she can wear for years. Look for neutral colours or classic styles that can be dressed up or down.

Personalized Jewelry: A piece of jewellery that’s customised with her initials, birthstone, or a meaningful engraving will add a personal touch to her accessory collection. Look for delicate necklaces, bracelets, or rings from brands like Mejuri or Pandora.

Designer Handbag: If you’re looking to splurge, a designer handbag from brands like Gucci, Prada, or Coach can be a show-stopping gift. Choose a versatile style that complements her wardrobe, whether it’s a chic crossbody or a sophisticated tote.


3. For the Homebody


If she loves spending time at home, these cosy gifts will help her relax and unwind during the colder months:

Weighted Blanket: A calming weighted blanket can provide warmth and comfort, making it a thoughtful gift for anyone who loves to relax on the couch with a good book or movie.

Scented Candles: A luxurious scented candle from brands like Jo Malone, Diptyque, or Voluspa will fill her home with warm, inviting aromas.

Personalized Throw Blanket: A cosy, soft throw blanket that’s personalised with her name, initials, or a favourite quote will add a touch of comfort and style to her space.


4. For the Wellness Enthusiast


If she’s into health, fitness, and wellness, gifts that support her well-being are sure to be appreciated. Consider these ideas:

Yoga Mat and Accessories: A high-quality yoga mat, like those from Liforme or Manduka, along with matching accessories (blocks, straps, or a water bottle), can help her feel zen during every practice.

Fitness Tracker: A fitness tracker like the Fitbit Charge or Apple Watch will help her monitor her steps, workouts, sleep, and overall health.

Aromatherapy Diffuser: A beautiful diffuser paired with essential oils can transform her space into a relaxing sanctuary. Opt for calming blends like lavender, eucalyptus, or peppermint.


5. For the Adventurer


If she’s always on the move, loves to travel, or enjoys exploring new outdoor activities, these gifts will fuel her sense of adventure:

Travel Backpack: A stylish yet functional backpack, like those from Nomatic or Away, will help her stay organised on the go, whether she’s travelling for work or going on a weekend getaway.

Portable Charger: A sleek, portable charger will ensure her devices stay powered up no matter where she is. Consider high-capacity options from Anker or Mophie for long-lasting power.

Travel Journal: For a woman who loves documenting her journeys, a beautifully crafted travel journal can be a wonderful gift. Brands like Moleskine and Leatherology offer high-quality, customisable options.


6. For the Foodie


For the woman who loves to cook, bake, or indulge in delicious treats, these gift ideas will feed her passions:

Cookbook by Her Favorite Chef: If she loves to cook, a cookbook from one of her favourite chefs or a trendy new release (like “The Nordic Baking Book” or “Ottolenghi Flavor”) can inspire her next culinary adventure.

Artisan Chocolate Box: A box of gourmet chocolates from premium chocolatiers like Godiva or Vosges will satisfy her sweet tooth and offer a taste of luxury.

Cooking Class Experience: Treat her to a hands-on cooking class where she can learn new skills, whether it’s making pasta, mastering sushi, or perfecting her pastry techniques.


7. For the Book Lover


If she’s always with her nose in a book, thoughtful literary gifts will speak to her heart:

Personalized Book Subscription: A subscription to services like Book of the Month or Audible will keep her reading (or listening) to new releases throughout the year.

Elegant Bookmarks: A beautifully crafted bookmark made of leather, metal, or wood can add a touch of sophistication to her reading routine.

First Edition or Signed Copy: For a true book lover, a first edition or signed copy of her favourite book or a highly anticipated release will make a memorable and meaningful gift.


8. For the Creative Soul


If she’s artistic or loves to express herself through DIY projects, these gifts will inspire her creativity:

Art Supplies Set: A high-quality set of paints, sketchbooks, or calligraphy tools from brands like Winsor & Newton or Copic markers will fuel her artistic passion.

Craft Kit: Whether she loves knitting, crocheting, or embroidery, a DIY craft kit can provide hours of creative fun. Look for kits that offer unique projects like macramé plant hangers or custom jewellery making.

Instant Camera: An instant camera like the Fujifilm Instax Mini is a fun way for her to capture memories and print photos instantly. It’s perfect for creative souls who enjoy documenting life through pictures.


9. For the Sentimental Soul


If she values meaningful and thoughtful gifts, these personalised options will tug at her heartstrings:

Memory Book or Scrapbook: Create a personalised scrapbook that chronicles your time together, filled with photos, mementoes, and handwritten notes.

Personalized Name Necklace: A delicate necklace with her name or the initials of her loved ones can become an everyday reminder of her connections and memories.


Conclusion


The holidays are a perfect opportunity to give gifts that make her feel cherished and appreciated. Whether you’re choosing something luxurious, practical, or meaningful, the best gift is one that speaks to her personality and interests. By considering what she loves and what will bring her joy, you’ll be able to give her a present that will make her holiday season even brighter.



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